Self Discovery

11/3/2008 at 12:07 PM

Can be a powerful thing once you get there. Learning who you are, what strengths and weaknesses you have. Everyone finds themselves eventually, some sooner than others. As I sit here thinking, as corny as it may sound. I am fortunate to know who I am. Even though it took the long bumpy road to get to this point in my life. It makes me a better writer and a better person because of it. The writing process of writing my third poetry book was a much longer one that I had expected. Mainly because I had too many distractions along the way. In the end it made it even more rewarding to see the final product of all my hard work. Writing isnt just a hobby to me, its a way of life. And without it, I think I truely would be lost.Another writer would understand what I mean when I say this, Its not easy to be one. There are many challenges that come along with it. As there is with any other talent one would possess. Everyone must over come them, work at them. To be the best they can be in their passion. Among this rambling handful of words, there is a reason for everything that I do to inspire the creative juices to flow and turn out the best possible piece of work I can each time I write.
Though the title didnt come til much later, When Light Comes to Shadows was written during a time of healing and self- discovery, I felt the need to looking into myself and write about my strengths,flaws and weaknesses that I had to move on and learn more about the woman behind the writing. I wanted to go a little deeper and find it, it is okay to be her. To not be perfect and not be what someone expects her to be. I am just me, and that will never change. Ive accepted that. That with this writing, Im not closing these doors for good but leaving them unlocked just for the sake of going back and remembering where I was and where I am heading...

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Conflict of Indecision

6/27/2008 at 2:58 PM

Gone with what I thought were simple things,
Exhaustion has claimed me.
Maybe on the inside I'm falling apart.
Secretly, I think I'm letting it happen.
Where skin folded red over my strangled personality,
I fell to pieces
Cutting shards of my life away.
In too deep, to reveal what was black.
I became too dependant on who I was,
And who I have become.
Life, I am not worthy.
I think maybe I think too much.
And I deprived myself of what maybe I deserved.
Somewhere there's still courage behind
the undecided.
Somehow I lived through what it is to live again.
Broom at hand,
Broken glass was swept under the rug.
Where vision is more that meets the eye,
Shards that glistened against the hardwood floor
took no chance to reflect.
Yet, I never made the connection

F.McCurdy
Taken from my book " If Storms Bared No Skies"
on lulu.com

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Seduction

6/26/2008 at 12:39 PM

Pouring seductive rain into the ocean's waves.
An exquisite trail of notes whispering subdued apprehension,
Searching the waters for your soul.
Listening for the moments forever desired,
Rising and falling with elaborations of the melody.
Seduction bathed in my voice,
With rich tones seeking to entice.
Touching with the hypnotic shift of the brisk swirling currents,
My song is a signature in the ocean wake.
Notes shrouding my suffering like floating ice,
Concealing the turmoil underneathe the waves.
An illusion of serenity reflects in the cold waters,
Becoming a shrouding mask against its surface.
Broken only by the occasional echo,
Tears both converge and sunder,
casting light and dark.
Emerging and sinking back into obscurity,
With a plea so strong it overcomes mind and will.
Anger and affection drain from my heart,
A vast tempast consuming my distressed spirit.
My mind struggling for a resolution to my stormy thoughts.
THings volatile and unsteady change with every breath.
I said such terrible things that final day,
Things I thought were truth.
Things now, I can never take back.
You didn't understand.
Giving me instead a cloudy smile in return.
Shimmering into a patch of frost between us.
A dwindling apparaition fading into dreamscapes.
I felt your love depart,
A somber plume of dust drifting past my window.
Leaving velvet darkness reluctant to yield the light.
Your eyes cast a stoney cold sheen that terrifies me.
Anguish driven so deep its unseen.
Spiraling like twisted horns deep inside,
Casting maleviolent shadows on my face.
I find my memory of you has faded,
But thinking of you brings back the ache and the need
rushing back.
Hear my song and come back to me.
My love,
Let me feel your soul next to me forever.
Let me get lost in seduction.
I know I like to let myself suffer awhile,
Before I finally let go.

F. McCurdy
From my upcoming book

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